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Here’s the deal, all my notes for my posts are on my phone and my phone has broken. It’s nobody’s fault (Meg) but I can’t post without my notes. So please forgive me for the delay. This is foreal foreals like a pimp trying to take out a loan for bitch slapping, wait what? Ok anyway, I should be getting a new phone shipped to me sometime this week. I really apologize. Please keep reading and stay Delafresh! Also if you have my number, please send me a message so I can lock you in my new phone once it gets here. Thanks!

Hold me accountable

Ok, for those who are close enough to me or just read my Facebook (oh the irony), I landed my first job out of college and in the field last October. I moved to Portales, a small town in New Mexico, to run a newsroom at 23. Sometime I can’t even fathom that but yes, it’s true. As senior writer at the Portales News-Tribune, I hold a lot of responsibility. So there are no excuses for why I haven’t been consistent, I should expect to know what comes with the job. I am also in the process of moving. I decided to get out of my old place because my roommates were crazy. Living there had me feeling as if I were sucked into a black hole when I came home. I needed to escape because they were leaving me uninspired. So with the work demand, the move and just general life problems, I decided  I needed to better balance this out. Delafreshnews is still my heart, my dream. No one pays me to write this stuff, I just find the humor in so many things and honestly people like their news with a shot of laughter. Why do you think the Daily Show and SNL are so popular?

Starting July 16, I pledge:

  • Weekly posts on Mondays with a look into a variety of the previous week’s national and world news stories.
  • Twitter headlines. If you have more questions about a story, just hit reply and I’ll answer.

In the future I plan on broadcasting the Delafreshnews online, hopefully in the fall. I’m also looking for contributing writers, someone who has a different sense of humor than me so they can offer other content to the site. Anybody interested in writing sports? Hit me up. And I’m definitely still looking for people to collaborate with on many other projects.

So it’s been killing me about all these great stories that passed me that I really wanted to write about. Here’s a little taste of what I’ve been doing:

Sharing is caring

Here are some great stories we missed (punchline style):

  • Instagram was down last week. Why were so many people eager to get back to the duck faces and food porn?
  • Here’s an old one, LeBron James got a ring. Hooray for James, now the only person still waiting is Jennifer Aniston. But if it didn’t happen in his favor, he would still be in the club. If you open your cereal and a ring is inside, you would have had more rings than LeBron James. Ladies, if you have a Nuva ring, you too would then have more rings than LeBron James.
  • Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise are divorcing. Too easy.
  • Obama’s Affordable Care Act was deemed constitutional by the SCOTUS and yet some people, especially those in red states, are still pissed about it. So if health care becomes privatized and they’re dying from diabetes, they can just go ask their big brothers, the corporations and banks for help.
  • Missisippi’s only abortion clinic remains open. Where else were women going to go to get rid of the inbred evidence?

I just can’t wait. If you have any questions, email me or hit me up through Twitter. And would it hurt you readers to promote, promote and promote? July 16, July 16 and July 16. Oh yeah, July 16.



The 4/9 Report

Hope everyone had a good Easter, Passover; I’m not sure what you celebrate or if you celebrated at all but I’m sure food was involved. Easter Sunday is always followed by; I need to get back to my diet Monday. Gyms will be filled up today. Here’s what went on last week and please stay tuned for more news by following me on twitter @cdelafresh.

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The 3/19/12 Report

I check my numbers, I think they’re wrong but if they are correct, I need to get my readership up. I want to give you consistency, no excuses. I’m not like Desperate Housewives, I don’t take two week breaks to leave you in suspense for award shows and specials, I’m just really working hard at the newspaper. Aiming to be a great reporter shows me I had to make sacrifices but also makes Delafreshnews. My passion is still giving readers news that they can laugh at. Believe me, I live in a small enough town where I‘ve considered creating a blog just about the experiences here under an alias of course but one step at a time. So here is the post I promised you if you’re reading out there, and PLEASE no spam comments, just genuine feedback. I’ll take it all. Thanks!

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Vamp, vamp!

Once I get all my stories and published work back up, I’m hitting you with two news posts this week. Keep following on Twitter and interact with me @cdelafresh. There is a lot more creative juices flowing so be prepared! It’s not just hype. I owe you a special post Friday, and your usual news Monday. So until then, stay #Delafresh!

Speaking my mind, spilling my guts out

How do I find the thinkers? I want to be around analytical people and programmers and comedians and assholes and sarcasm and wit. Does this make any sense? I’m trying to figure out how much of my mental capacity I am using. Being in a room of thinkers will be like cardio for the brain. People who are better than you at what you want to be great at will only push you to be better. Nobody wants to be compared, everyone claims they are in their own category but great ideas usually come from an initial idea that has been improved.


As far as I know now, everything I’ve learned as a journalism student and as a hard-working intern has been uprooted. For an epiphany hit me today that you must never lose your childhood curiosity, something that is a key asset to have as a journalist. You always have to be questioning why things are the way they are, how do we know anything and you must hold officials and promoters accountable for their lies and or carelessness. But even my thought process on writing stories being changed every time I take a new job, my life has also been affected simultaneously. I realized how lucky I am to be here in this position. I have to give a pat on the back. And I have to realize that this is really a beginning. I already humbled myself once; I think life is a journey that demands humility. For no matter how great you think you are, you will receive many “no’s” but once you get that “yes,” the door creaks open just a little and you have to keep on pushing.


I was driving home the other day from a hard one at work. All I could think about is where I will be five years later and why can’t I wake up the next day and just be there? Why? Because I haven’t figured out how to get there or else I’d be there. Like Mark Zuckerberg said, if you founded Facebook, then you would be the founder of Facebook. Again, I’m not there because life is a journey, and nothing would be worthy if you didn’t work for it because it’s easily attainable. Whatever you receive, accomplishments will feel earned. It’s not about knowing you’ll be there, it’s about having faith and confidence in yourself to know you’ll be there.


I graduated from Texas Southern University, and I’m a proud alum, no sugar coating. I can’t hate or have regrets because TSU is a part of me and if I denied TSU, I’d be denying part of me and my history. When I was there, I considered myself to be among the elite, also, the social elite. Not that all other students were beneath us if they weren’t visible or known but, it was clear who ran the school and who even cared. I was in the midway. I enjoyed who I knew but I sympathized for those who had no idea what was going on but laughed that those same people could be the next startup billionaire. But what I am alluding to is the fact that because I was “on top,” I was lazy. The ambition never died, it was just buried. I coasted on being great and stopped seeking challenges because the pace was so slow and I didn’t feel there were enough go-getters with that exception of the elite. But then again, those kids were caught up in social values and not really being the next Bill Gates, or Barack Obama. Well…some were (Kedarious Colbert) but trust me, some great, outstanding minds come and will continue to come from TSU. I’m just happy I got my degree and moved on. Still proud, but the next steps are always the best steps. Because like my boy Jeff Bell told me, the sh*t hits the fan and gets real when you graduate. Loans come in and you’re broke trying to figure out what you want to do if you haven’t already chosen more school or had job offers. That’s when my ego hurt the most, when nobody threw letters or knocked on my door, as if my graduation was supposed to be some announcement for them to come.


I stopped wallowing after the celebration and before the passion came back. I knew I had to spike that adrenaline, that rush to be the best again, I knew I needed change. So yes, taking a job offer, hearing that first yes and being here is just the beginning. But every day, I will try to be better than the last. Life is about change, balance, and progression. And as much as I try to separate religion from writing, I’m not ashamed to say I have an awesome God. I’m not trying to convert people or push my views about God on others, but I do know that he is with me every step of the way, every fall, every triumph and I will not deny him, that is what faith is about.


I plan to do so much more, I’m sitting here now looking how I can rearrange my room for better thinking, what pilot will I think of tomorrow, what shows will I pitch to the thinkers and the dreamers? I just want to be amazing, and I’m not letting go, I don’t want to let go of this feeling that makes me question everything or I will always accept things the way they are.


Without any cocky undertones, I must say this, I will be somebody, I’m already me, I’m just pitching a better me every day. Watch out for me, I’ll try to remain as human as I can be.

The 2/28/12 Report

Did Oscar host Billy Crystal hit a home run?

So what if I’m late, you guys ever heard of a job?!? One you have to work a lot of overtime for?!? I’m sorry I flew off the handle there (awkward silence)…Let’s get started shall we? I’ll make this quick, but also follow me on Twitter for comedic headlines and I guess my business, and read weekly!
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The 2/20/2012 Report


It's a Linvasion! Jeremy Lin is such a hot topic but is he the real deal? SNL's opening sketch was all Lin

Ok its Presidents’ Day, perfect day to not be on hiatus. I’m sorry guys, trust me, my heart is Delafreshnews but I have been crazy busy and getting hacked was not in the grand scheme of things. See recently I became a full-time reporter at the Portales News Tribune in New Mexico. My first job in the field after graduation!!!! So in addition to getting hacked, I moved twice within the last 6 months and I’ve been dealing with being a rookie reporter. I leave the comedy here. If you want to check out some real news that I’m writing daily for Portales, check out and type in my name and most of bylines should show up. So I’m back, I will be tweeting news headlines to keep you guys up to speed while bringing you laughter. So happy Presidents’ Day and for those of you who need an excuse to drink, there you go you holiday drunks, here’s this week’s report:
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Fed up with the selfish

The worst thing one can be in this world is selfish. Most people will say liars but who can honestly say they haven’t told a lie, or embellished the truth?

We’re human and we all make mistakes but one of the vilest characteristics a human can embody is being selfish.
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Top Models Kendra and Donte

(TSU Top Models is a featured column I created for Texas Southern University’s Student Newspaper, The Herald. Top Models features two TSU students, one male and one female, who are role models and active students on campus. The purpose is to highlight students who epitomize TSU’s motto, “Excellence in Achievement.”)


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